LOADING... Emily J. Hooks

What Self-love Is Not and Why It Matters

How to Ritualize the Passing of the Year and Usher in a New Beginning

As the year draws to a close and the dawn of 2017 emerges, it is time to reflect. I recently looked back at my goals for 2016 and was surprised to find I had not achieved most of them. Interestingly, none of the amazing and beautiful things I was blessed to be a part of…


A Perfect Time of Year for Forgiveness

Happy Holidays! Christmas is my favorite holiday. Bright lights. Cheerful, familiar music. Freshly baked goodies and the earthy aroma of cedar and pine. The crispness in the air. I love it all. Most of all, I love spending time thinking about what I can do to express my love and make the people in my…


What Is True Justice?

Many of the most heartbreaking human experiences happen over and over again because we fail to heal. We fail to grasp the significance of our individual contribution and share what we have learned. We fail to forgive. We seek vengeance in the name of justice and wonder why the world gets ever more violent. We…


The Fundamentals of Forgiveness: What Forgiveness Is and Is Not

The Fundamentals of Forgiveness: What Forgiveness Is and Is Not A fellow writer-friend once publicly shared her contempt for forgiveness. Why, she said, should she have to forgive her cruel, abusive father when he’s the one who is so f-ed up? It’s not fair. I’m the victim. Why should I do the work? How can…


What It Took For Me to Forgive: by Madeleine Black

I never intended to forgive the two young men who gang raped me when I was 13 years old.  I wanted to hate them forever. As far as I was concerned they were evil, sadistic animals and I wanted someone to kidnap them, tie them up, beat them up, rape and torture them just like…


Would You Rather be Right or Know Peace? The Power of Non-Judgment

We have all heard the cliché, would you rather be right or happy? Sometimes it’s just easier to let the other person claim victory. But, secretly, you know better. You know you’re way of seeing things is right; you’re just being the better human. This dynamic is not the pathway to true peace (transitory happiness…


Is Yom Kippur a Dance of Forgiveness? by Louisa Hext

Yom Kippur for me is the most significant of all Jewish holidays. Known as the Day of Atonement, it occurs on the 10th day of Tishri, the seventh month in the Jewish calendar. Tradition holds that on this day, Moses received the second set of Commandments, 40 days after *G-d forgave the Israelites for praying…


The Fundamentals of Forgiveness: Why We Resist Healing

Intuitively we know forgiveness will lead to healing and freedom from the bonds of the past. Anyone who grew up in a mainstream religion or household centered on ethics has learned that forgiveness is a thing we should do, yet we resist. We fight against the very thing we know will open the door to…


Why Does Empathy Matter in Forgiveness?

Empathy is the ability to walk a mile in another’s skin; to consider life from their perspective. It involves both an intellectual capacity to imagine and an emotional attunement to their experience. Empathy is an integral part of forgiving others and the self. Forgiving Others Let’s first look at why empathy matters when forgiving someone…


The Fundamentals of Forgiveness: Psychological and Physical Health Benefits

Forgiveness is a process of self-actualization in which we choose to move through hurt feelings such as shame, anger, and resentment in favor of self-compassion, self-love, and empathy. Doesn’t that sound liberating? One of the oddities of doing this work is seeing how transformative the work can be and how much people resist it.  Let’s try…

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