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Fundamentals

Fundamentals of Forgiveness: Creating Joy with Non-Judgment

We have all heard the tried-and-true cliché, “Would you rather be right or happy?” It turns out there is great wisdom in this infuriating little platitude. Being right, or more accurately, being attached to it, is a judgment and it can take many forms. Sometimes, the subtlest judgments are what hold us back from joy…

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You Are Not Your Story

We all have a story. It is a part of the human condition. And, like all universal human experiences, it serves an important purpose. How we relate to the story we have about our life guides our actions, informs our world view and beliefs, and impacts our quality of life. Given its power, developing an…

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The Fundamentals of Forgiveness: What Forgiveness Is and Is Not

The Fundamentals of Forgiveness: What Forgiveness Is and Is Not A fellow writer-friend once publicly shared her contempt for forgiveness. Why, she said, should she have to forgive her cruel, abusive father when he’s the one who is so f-ed up? It’s not fair. I’m the victim. Why should I do the work? How can…

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The Fundamentals of Forgiveness: Why We Resist Healing

Intuitively we know forgiveness will lead to healing and freedom from the bonds of the past. Anyone who grew up in a mainstream religion or household centered on ethics has learned that forgiveness is a thing we should do, yet we resist. We fight against the very thing we know will open the door to…

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The Fundamentals of Forgiveness: Psychological and Physical Health Benefits

Forgiveness is a process of self-actualization in which we choose to move through hurt feelings such as shame, anger, and resentment in favor of self-compassion, self-love, and empathy. Doesn’t that sound liberating? One of the oddities of doing this work is seeing how transformative the work can be and how much people resist it.  Let’s try…

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